The Doors to the Soul
by Destined Darkness
Summary: The eyes are the doors to the soul and these souls have seen death through these eyes. These eyes are old eyes in young faces, these eyes are young eyes in young faces and these eyes have seen so much, too much.
1. First Death

I got bored one day and decided to write this weird bunch of drabbles so... hope you enjoy :)

Episode related: The Parting of Ways (Doctor Who, Episode 13, series 1)  
>Character: Jack<p>

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><p>The eyes are the doors to the soul and these souls have seen death through these eyes. These eyes are old eyes in young faces, these eyes are young eyes in young faces and these eyes have seen so much, too much.<p>

He's backed against the wall, there's no escape for him; this is his end. And he's lying to himself, telling himself he doesn't regret anything, but he does. He regrets so much. He's young, he's so young, he's still got so much life left ahead of him, he's got so many people left to love and leave and he's got so many more battles to fight. He tosses the useless gun away and faces his enemy. Determination, acceptance and a shine of regret in his eyes; his too young eyes. He's determined not to let the Doctor down, he respects, trusts and loves that man with the young face and old eyes, he couldn't bear his disapproval again. He accepts that this is his end, he accepts that this is how he is going to die and he thinks that maybe it was about time, he's been running from death his whole life and it had finally caught up. He regrets; regrets so much but he thinks that, if he's giving his life to help the Doctor, to help the Doctor save the universe, to save Rose, then he thinks that maybe that's not such a bad death after all. And he looks at his murderers with his too young eyes in his too young face and he takes what is coming for him with bravery he never thought he had and when the light leaves those too young eyes in that too young face and his soul escapes through the open doors, he doesn't regret a thing anymore.

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><p>I've actually finished all the drabbles, but if I decide I want to add Jenny or Lisa or the Master into it I'll just add them in later on. I REFUSE! to do season 4 of Torchwood (Miracle Day) and I'm not going to do the 11th Doc's stuff cos... I'm still... it still hurts to think of the Doctor as not David Tennent... : Thinking of 9 is okay because he came before David but Matt is after David and it's just... :( I'm going to start crying again... :(


	2. Regretting

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: The Parting of Ways (Doctor Who, Episode 13, series 1)  
>Character: The Doctor (9)<p>

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><p>He's watching her, her with her too young eyes and her too young face, eyes that he can't see anymore, eyes that are glowing with a yellow light that means death and new life for those of his kind, for him. And she's hurting, he can tell, and he knows what he has to do, he knows how he can save her. And he pulls her to him and kisses her, breathing in the Vortex energy, breathing in the thing that's killing her. He breaks the kiss, letting the energy return to the TARDIS, to the Vortex, but the damage is done, he's dying. And he and Rose head back into the TARDIS and he knows that Jack's alive, he felt it the moment Jack returned and that in itself causes him to just leave as soon as they enter the TARDIS. His too old eyes are filled with regret, anger, desperation, grief and he can't help but know that it's all his fault and he can't help but feel cheated that these are going to be his last feelings in this body; he just kissed the girl he loves but that doesn't come close to anything, not now. He regrets leaving Jack behind; he regrets ever taking Jack along, regrets ruining another life, creating another soldier. He's angry, angry with Rose for looking into the Heart of the TARDIS, he's angry with himself for ever bringing her along too, for causing her to be put in danger, he's angry at the Daleks, he killed his people to end the Time-War and rid the universe of the Daleks but he only succeeded in killing his people and for what? He's desperate, he needs to explain things to Rose, explain so she won't run, explain so she won't <em>leave <em>him like he left Jack, like he left so many others. He's grieving because of all the people on that satellite; they died because of him, he's grieving for Jack; another coward turned warrior, another life tainted, he's grieving for his people; he destroyed them for nothing. And as his too old eyes in his young face start to glow that yellowy colour, he can't help but understand that this is how it's always going to be. He's going to fight and run and die for the universe and he's going to enchant and change and taint humans for the rest of his life because he's selfish and he _needs _them because without them… without them he thinks he'll destroy all of creation. And as his too old eyes change but yet remain the same, and his young face becomes even younger, he understands that all he can do is exactly what he has done, continue.

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><p>:)<p> 


	3. Promises

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Doomsday (Doctor Who, Episode 13, series 2)  
>Character: Rose Tyler<p>

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><p>She's being sucked into the Void, and she can see the horror in his too old eyes, she doesn't know that he can see the fear in her too young eyes in her too young face. And then she's not being tugged anymore and she can't see him anymore, can't see his too old eyes in his too young face and she just can't help but cry because she's gone and he's gone and they aren't together anymore even though they weren't 'together' in the first place. And she can't help but feel cheated, annoyed, upset. She feels she's been cheated because she got her father back but it's not even <em>her <em>father and she lost her Doctor, the man with the too old eyes and the too young face and the Blue Police Phone Box that could go anywhere in Time and Space. She's annoyed because she let go, she's annoyed because she wanted to stay with him no matter what. She's upset because she loves him, him with his too old eyes and his too young face and his screwdriver that can't work on wood, she loves him, her Doctor, the man with the too old eyes and his too young face and his love _for_ her, she loves him and she can't, they can't… because she let go. And as she lays her head against the wall and tears fall from her too young eyes and roll down her too young face, she wishes it didn't have to be this way, but because it does, she will do what she promised him she'd do so long ago. She will have a good life, for him.

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><p>:)<p> 


	4. Envy

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Everything Changes (Torchwood, Episode 1, season 1)  
>Character: Captain Jack Harkness<p>

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><p>And when the bullet rips through his head, he's shocked; those old eyes in that young face, they didn't see this coming and he berates himself for that because he should have seen it coming. And he stands, and there's pain in his old eyes in his young face, there's pain that no one notices because he's a master in dealing with pain. He brushes it off like it's nothing but it is and it's there in his old eyes in his young face. It's there because it is his constant and he lies to himself that he's used to it, he's not. How could he be? He just died and came back, it's not the first time and it's certainly not going to be the last. And then the gun goes off and there's regret in his old eyes in his young face, there's regret, self-loathing, envy. Regret because he couldn't save her, he could never save them. Self-loathing because he drove her to this, he hired her, he didn't notice when she fell apart, this is his fault. He feels envious because <em>she <em>can _die _and stay dead and _he _can't, and he's still not sure that he doesn't want to. But he can't die, so he will go on living with his old eyes in his young face, go on living and dreaming of the day when his curse will end

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><p>:)<p> 


	5. Agony

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Everything Changes (Torchwood, Episode 1, season 1)  
>Character: Suzie Costello<p>

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><p>And there's shock in her too young eyes and on her too young face, shock and anger and anguish. Shock because she didn't expect Jack to come back, and why would she expect him to? She shot him in the <em>head<em> for heavens sake. She's angry because she knows that no matter what she does now, that cop is going to get her job, her job, the job that destroyed her life and it's going to be given away. She's in agony because she knows what she has to do now, she knows she failed and that she's taking the cowards way out but she couldn't care less about that right now, her too young eyes in her too young face have seen too much. And she pulls the trigger and as the light flees her too young eyes in her too young face and her soul escapes, she decides she made the right choice and she dies without regret.

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><p>:)<p> 


	6. Scared

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: 42 (Doctor Who, Episode 7, series 3)  
>Character: The Doctor (9)<p>

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><p>And he's scared, he's oh so scared, and he's crying, she's knows, and he's in pain, oh so much pain and he can't open his eyes, his beautiful too old eyes that don't match with his too young face. He can't open his eyes because they're the doors to his soul and his soul's got a visitor. And he's screaming and he thinks he's going to die, thinks he's going to regenerate and he knows that no matter what, he knows he has to fight the thing that's hurting him, the thing trying to make him kill the others on the ship, he can't allow that, he's the Doctor. And then the light leaves his too old eyes in his too young face and he breathes, breathes deep and he just wants to cry from relief, from memory of the pain, but then there's a grin on his face and the right light is back in his too old eyes and he knows he's got a bit of time ahead of him yet.<p>

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><p>:)<p> 


	7. Betrayal

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: End of Days (Torchwood, Episode 13, season 1)  
>Character: Captain Jack Harkness<p>

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><p>His old eyes in his young face, they saw this coming, he always knew someone would betray him, and yeah, he'd known it'd be Owen, but he didn't expect <em>all <em>of them to turn on him, especially not Ianto or Tosh. Gwen he could understand, she thought she was doing the right thing. Then the gun went off and his old eyes in his young face hadn't expected _that_. As the light leaves the old eyes in the young face, he thinks he's okay with it because he's going to end up dying again soon anyway.

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><p>:)<p> 


	8. Devouring

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: End of Days (Torchwood, Episode 13, season 1)  
>Character: Captain Jack Harkness<p>

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><p>Being 'devoured' by Abbadon, the son of the Beast, Jack thinks, will be his most memorable death thus far. His old eyes in his young face see exactly what he has to do, and at the time he didn't understand how painful an experience it would be but then, it wouldn't have changed a thing if he had known. He bares himself to the demon, practically <em>demanding <em>to be 'devoured.' And Abbadon takes the bait. And when Jack dies, he can't help but feel just a little smug, and why shouldn't he? He just killed Abbadon the Devourer and is going to live to tell the tale.


	9. Vortex

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Utopia (Doctor Who, Episode 11, series 3) *End of Days (Torchwood, Episode 13, season 1)  
>Character: Captain Jack Harkness<p>

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><p>He travels through the Time Vortex, clinging with all he's got to the TARDIS. He can't see through his old eyes in his young face but he doesn't care. He screams the entire trip and when he dies, when the light temporarily leaves his old eyes in his young face, when his soul attempts to flee, he couldn't be anymore happier; he thinks he's going to be fixed.<p>

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><p>* At the end of 'End of Days' the TARDIS can be heard Materializing and Jack looks at the severed hand the Doctor lost, during Christmas Invasion, which is glowing. This leads into Utopia when Jack can be found running towards the TARDIS screaming 'DOCTOR!' :)<p> 


	10. Understanding

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Utopia (Doctor Who, Episode 11, series 3)  
>Character: Captain Jack Harkness<p>

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><p>His old eyes in his young face, he sees what he has to do, he understands that this will kill him but he doesn't care. He has to do it; the Doctor will be counting on him to do it. And as the shock ripples through him and he crumples to the floor, as the light temporarily leaves his old eyes in his young face for what he thinks is the billionth time, he thinks it's still worth it, he'll come back anyway.<p>

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><p>:)<p> 


	11. Tired

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: The Sound of Drums (Doctor Who, Episode 12, series 3)  
>Character: The Doctor (10)<p>

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><p>And he's old now, so, so old. And his too old eyes finally fit with the face he wears, the too old face with the too old eyes. And he's oh so tired; he barely has the strength to keep his eyes open. And his two hearts are beating painfully in his chest and his lungs keep giving out but he knows he won't die this way, if he was, he'd already be dead. And then his too old eyes are back in his too young face and he's never felt so alive but yet so <em>empty <em>at the same time. But that's just how things are for him, his too old eyes have seen too much and he knows it's not the end.

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><p>:)<p> 


	12. A Doctor Dies

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Reset (Torchwood, Episode 6, Season 2)  
>Character: Dr. Owen Harper<p>

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><p>And his too young eyes in his too young face, and his brilliant mind, they didn't see this coming, they didn't predict this. And he moves to protect Martha, he didn't know, his young eyes didn't know, couldn't know that… And he's taking small steps forward now, speaking nonsense, he doesn't want to die but if someone has to die he'd rather it be him than the rest of his team… maybe not Jack. And he didn't see it coming. And he's on the ground dying and he can't breathe and he's in oh so much pain and there are so many regrets in his too young eyes in his too young face. So, so many regrets. He's so young, he's still got things to live for, things to see, to do. And then the light leaves his too young eyes and his soul flees his body, and his last wish was that he could be with Katie again but he knows he can't and he dies with oh so may regrets.<p>

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><p>:)<p> 


	13. Love

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Exit Wounds (Torchwood, Episode 13, Season 2)  
>Character: Dr. Owen Harper<p>

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><p>And he never saw this coming, they never saw this coming. And there's no light in his young eyes in his young face. He's dead, but he's still walking and talking and now he's going to die, permanently and he can't help but rage because he doesn't want to die again, can't believe he has to die again. And then he hears her crying and he checks himself because he likes Tosh, no he <em>loves <em>Tosh but every time he looks at her he sees Katie and that just hurts him more than she can ever know. And he apologizes and they say their goodbyes and then he stands up, determination on his young face, death in his young eyes. And this time, he dies knowing it's for the best, he was just a walking corpse after all.

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><p>:)<p> 


	14. Tragically Romantic

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Exit Wounds (Torchwood, Episode 13, Season 2)  
>Character: Toshiko Sato<p>

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><p>And she never saw this coming, they never saw this coming. And there's a dying light in her young eyes in her young face. Young eyes that have seen too much, that have cried too many tears. And she knows she's dying. She knows she can't be saved now. And he's dying with her and they're dying together and she thinks that maybe it's more tragically romantic that they get to <em>die <em>together than the beautifully romantic dream they could have had of _living _together. And she thinks that maybe, if she had to choose, she'd choose what she already has because at least if she dies with Owen then she doesn't have to live long enough to turn into the arsehole he became after Katie. And she'd choose it again because then at least Owen wouldn't be just walking through death with nothing to do and no body to see. And when she dies, when the light leaves her too young eyes in her too young face, she dies with a smile and without regrets because… it never could have gone any other way.

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><p>:)<p> 


	15. Time of Dying

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Turn Left (Doctor Who, Episode 11, Series 4)  
>Character: Donna Noble<p>

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><p>And she's going to die, she didn't want to die, she didn't think she would die, she just thought things would blink out of existence; she thought she wouldn't feel pain but she is. Lying prone on the cold road, every bone in her body broken or digging into places they shouldn't be. She's bleeding internally and she's dying. And through her too young eyes in her too young face, she can see Rose looking down at her and then she hears the message Rose has for her and then she fades away and the light leaves her eyes but only for a moment and she can't be happier when it does.<p>

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><p>:)<p> 


	16. Deja Vu

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Journey's End (Doctor Who, Episode 13, Series 4)  
>Character: Captain Jack Harkness<p>

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><p>And with his too old eyes in his too young face, he sees the Supreme Dalek and he can't help but feel the irony in the fact that Rose is here, the Doctor's here, he's here and the Daleks are here, and they're going to kill him, again. It's just like the first time, only this time everything's oh so messed up. He's over 2000 years old now but he still looks like he did the day he died the first time, the Doctor's a different Doctor than the one that was there that day but then he's still the same, and Rose… sweet, sweet Rose, she's different now. She's older and wiser but she still looks the same and she's working with Torchwood too but in a different world and Jack can't help but think it ironic that both of the 9th Doctor's final companions joined and worked for Torchwood, an institute the Doctor despises. And Jack thinks that maybe dying this time won't hurt as much as it did back then… he's wrong and he feels the zap go through him and then he falls and this time he just can't wait to come back to life.<p>

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><p>:)<p> 


	17. Remember Me Not

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Journey's End (Doctor Who, Episode 13, Series 4)  
>Character: DoctorDonna

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><p>And she's burning, her mind is burning, she's in so much pain but she can't go back, not now. Now she's someone, she means something in the universe. She can't go back. And the tears are falling from her too young eyes in her too young face and she's begging and pleading and crying and <em>dying <em>but he's not listening, he won't listen, she didn't think he would but he's _not _listening and she's begging him. And then he's taking her memories and she's falling asleep and the knowing glint in her eyes vanishes and she's back to being Donna, and as _she _dies, she has oh so many regrets, but that doesn't matter anymore because she can't remember. So when she dies, she dies happy.

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><p>:)<p> 


	18. Enough

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Children of Earth, Day Two (Torchwood, Episode 2, Season 3)  
>Character: Captain Jack Harkness<p>

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><p>And his too old eyes in his too young face didn't expect this. No, his sad old eyes in his too young face never saw this coming. He thought there'd been enough death and destruction within the Torchwood base these past few months to last them a lifetime but… And he closes his too old eyes and lets a tear fall as the bomb in his stomach goes off, taking him and the Hub, the place he's called 'home' for the majority of his life, with him. And he dies regretting <em>everything.<em>

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><p>:)<p> 


	19. Innocence

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Children of Earth, Day Four (Torchwood, Episode 4, Season 3)  
>Character: Ianto Jones<p>

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><p>And he didn't think it would end this way, he didn't think he'd die so soon after losing Tosh and Owen. He didn't think he'd die before Gwen. But then, he guesses that he should have expected it. His too young eyes in his too young and innocent face should have seen this coming, he's been alive too long, and he's worked for Torchwood too long and this is how it ends for him. And he cries, he can't help it, he's <em>dying <em>and Jack won't even tell him he loves him. He's dying and it's the last chance he has to be told he's loved and it's not coming. Jack's not saying it. And he cries as the light leaves his eyes and the breath leaves his lungs and his heart beats its last. And he dies with oh so many regrets.

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><p>:)<p> 


	20. Hate

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Children of Earth, Day Four (Torchwood, Episode 4, Season 3)  
>Character: Jack Harkness<p>

* * *

><p>And he didn't see this coming, no; his sad old eyes never saw this coming. And now he's holding his lover in his arms, the lover he led by the hand to his death. And he regrets; he regrets everything. And tears fall from his too old eyes in his too young face. He's seen so much, done so much and died so many times. And as he dies this time, he wishes, with all his heart, that he can stay dead this time, he doesn't want to go on living if he can't go on living with Ianto, but he knows he's got no such luck and he dies hating everything.<p>

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><p>:)<p> 


	21. Screaming

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: Children of Earth, Day Five (Torchwood, Episode 5, Season 3)  
>Character: Steven Carter<p>

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><p>And he's screaming, his innocent way too young eyes in his way too young face are watering and he can't stop screaming. And he's dying, he's bleeding, his brain is melting and he can't seem to work out why but he thinks he understands what's happening. And he can't help but scream and he can't help but ask in his mind why his uncle is doing this to him. Why his uncle's killing him. And somewhere he can hear his mother screaming but that doesn't compare because he's screaming, he's in pain. And the light leaves his way too young eyes and he collapses to the ground, dead and he dies wishing it was just a bad nightmare.<p>

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><p>:)<p> 


	22. The End

Oh I do not own anything of these fandoms, just the hate that they killed ALL of my favourite people! *swears*

Episode related: The End of Time (Doctor Who, Episode 18, Series 4, Special Episode, Christmas Special.)  
>Character: The Doctor (10)<p>

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><p>And he's dying, for real this time, he knows there's no way to stop it and he's angry and he's upset and he's dying. And he's crying inside and he's dying inside and he doesn't know why but he makes sure he has some sort of goodbye with his former companions. Some way of saying he's sorry and that he misses them and just someway to know they're okay. And then the tears start to fall from his too old eyes in his soon to be younger face and he can't help it and then he's encased in a bright light and all he can think is 'I don't want to go!' And then he screams and he dies screaming.<p>

The eyes are the doors to the soul, and these doors have been opened to the world, opened to death so many times. The eyes are the doors to the soul, and the soul knows when the doors are open. These eyes are old eyes in young faces, these eyes are old eyes in old faces, these eyes are young eyes in young faces and these eyes are the open doors that let these souls free.

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><p>:) And that's the end, guys :) R&amp;R bros :)<p> 


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